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How To Stop Obsessing Over Someone?

How To Stop Obsessing Over Someone?

Have you ever found yourself spending countless hours thinking about someone who may not even be giving you a second thought? Are you constantly checking your phone, hoping for a message or call from them? Obsessing over someone can be an all-consuming and exhausting experience, but it’s a situation that many people find themselves in. The good news is that you don’t have to let it continue. In this article, we’ll explore some practical tips and strategies that can help you take control of your thoughts and emotions, and move on from your obsession with someone. Whether you’re dealing with unrequited love, a toxic relationship or a breakup, you’ll find solutions that can help you break free and start living your life again.

1. Recognize the Signs of Obsessive Behavior and Why It’s a Problem

In this section, we will explore what obsessive behavior in relationships really looks like and why it can become problematic. Obsessing over someone not only affects your emotional health but can also negatively impact your daily life, relationships, and work. Therefore, it is essential to recognize the signs of obsessive behavior to address them before they spiral out of control.

Signs of Obsessive Behavior

Obsessive behavior typically stems from a strong attachment or desire for someone, which can be intense and overwhelming. Here are some signs to look out for if you suspect you might be obsessing over someone:

– Constantly checking their social media, including their activities and updates

– ) Continuously thinking about them even when you’re supposed to be focusing on other tasks

– Going out of your way to be around them or contacting them despite not receiving the same level of effort in return

– Becoming angry, anxious, or depressed when they don’t respond or return your affection

Consequences of Obsessive Behavior

Obsessive behavior can have significant consequences on both your mental and emotional health. If left unchecked, the following consequences can arise:

– Feeling anxious and awkward around the person you’re obsessed with, leading to strained interactions and a damaged relationship.

– Neglecting your own needs, such as self-care and spending time with other friends and family, which can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation.

– Losing sense of self and identity as your world revolves solely around the person you’re obsessing over.

It is vital to acknowledge the signs of obsessive behavior and take action to avoid these negative consequences. In the next section, we will identify the root causes of your obsession and address them.

2. Identify the Root Causes of Your Obsession and Address Them

Identifying the root causes of your obsession is critical to overcoming it. Many times, the root cause of obsessive behavior is deeper than simply being fixated on someone. It may stem from past traumas, attachment issues, or even insecurity. It’s essential to address the root causes of your obsession to prevent it from becoming a recurring issue in your future relationships.

Pro Tip:

Start by reflecting on why you began obsessing over this person. Perhaps you’ve been through a breakup or experienced rejection in the past, which has triggered your behavior. Or maybe you’re struggling with loneliness or a lack of self-esteem, leading you to cling to this person. Understanding the underlying triggers behind your obsession will help you pinpoint what you need to address to move on.

Once you’ve identified the root causes of your obsession, it’s time to address them. This might mean seeking therapy to work through past traumas, practicing self-care, or developing a greater sense of self-worth and confidence. Building a strong support system can also be helpful, as it can provide you with people to talk to and lean on throughout the healing process.

Pro Tip:

Consider exploring new hobbies or interests that allow you to focus your attention elsewhere. You might also find it beneficial to create daily affirmations that remind you of your worth and encourage you to prioritize your well-being.

Remember, addressing the root causes of your obsession requires time, effort, and patience. It’s vital to give yourself the space to heal and grow as you work through your emotions and develop new coping mechanisms. By doing so, you’ll be able to move past your obsession and build healthier relationships in the future.

3. Develop Healthy Coping Strategies and Distract Yourself from the Obsession

Developing healthy coping strategies is essential to overcoming obsessive behaviors. To distract yourself from the obsession, first, identify activities that make you happy and engage in them. This is an excellent way to bring positivity into your life and shift your focus away from your obsession. Consider activities such as hiking, painting, or spending time with friends and family.

Another healthy coping strategy is to practice mindfulness. This involves being present and aware of your thoughts and feelings without reacting to them. Practicing mindfulness can help you identify negative thought patterns and reframe them in a more positive light. You can do this by practicing meditation, deep breathing exercises, or even just taking a walk in nature.

Lastly, consider limiting your exposure to triggers that may cause obsessive behaviors. This could mean avoiding certain places or people that remind you of the person you are obsessing over. Limiting your exposure can help you break the cycle of obsessing over someone and allow you to focus on improving yourself.

Examples of Healthy Coping Strategies:

  • Engage in physical activity to release endorphins and boost your mood
  • Meditate or practice deep breathing exercises
  • Spend time with friends and family to connect and build meaningful relationships
  • Write down your thoughts and feelings in a journal

Ultimately, developing healthy coping strategies allows you to take control of your thoughts and emotions. By prioritizing self-care and finding healthy distractions, you can learn to let go of your obsession and move forward in a positive direction.

4. Let Go of Control and Accept That You Can’t Make Someone Love You

Obsessing over someone often stems from a desire to control the relationship and make the other person reciprocate your feelings. However, it’s essential to realize that you can’t force someone to love you. Instead, you should focus on accepting and respecting their feelings, even if they don’t align with your own.

Firstly, try to shift your perspective and focus on yourself rather than the other person. You can’t control their actions or emotions, but you have the power to work on your own personal growth and well-being. Put your energy into pursuing your passions, spending time with loved ones, and investing in self-care activities that make you feel good.

Additionally, try to practice acceptance and mindfulness in your relationships. Accept that not everyone will feel the same way about you, and that’s okay. Revel in the present moment, rather than fixating on past moments or future possibilities. By letting go of control and living in the present, you can cultivate a sense of inner peace and ease.

Finally, it may be helpful to seek out professional help if you’re struggling to let go of control and accept reality. A therapist or counselor can offer guidance and support as you work through your obsessive thoughts and emotions. Remember, letting go is a process that takes time and effort, but it’s an essential step in moving forward and finding happiness.

5. Work on Improving Yourself and Building New Relationships

Improving yourself and building new relationships can be an effective way of dealing with an obsession with someone. It may be difficult at first, but with time, effort, and patience, you can find happiness and contentment in your life.

Focus on Self-Improvement

One of the best ways to stop obsessing over someone is to focus on improving yourself. This means setting goals for self-improvement and working towards achieving them. Whether it’s learning a new skill, pursuing a new hobby, or hitting the gym regularly, developing a healthy routine can help you achieve personal growth and foster a positive mindset.

Another effective way to work on self-improvement is to focus on your mental health. This involves practicing self-care habits, such as mindfulness, meditation, and journaling. These practices can help you stay centered, calm, and focused, which can help you move past your obsession with someone and feel more grounded in your life.

Build New Relationships

Building new relationships can also help you stop obsessing over someone. Whether it’s making new friends, volunteering, or joining social groups, meeting new people can introduce you to new perspectives, experiences, and opportunities.

It’s important to remember that building new relationships doesn’t mean you’re trying to replace the person you’re obsessed with. Instead, it’s about connecting with others and expanding your circle of support. Whether it’s a new friend or a romantic partner, these relationships can add value to your life and help you move forward from your obsession.

In conclusion, working on improving yourself and building new relationships are important steps towards moving on from an obsession with someone. Remember that change takes time, so be patient with yourself and celebrate every small win along the way.

6. Seek Professional Help If Necessary to Overcome Obsessive Behavior

Obsessive behavior can be difficult to overcome, especially if it’s been going on for a long time or if it’s affecting your daily life. Seeking professional help from a therapist, counselor, or psychiatrist can provide you with the tools and support you need to break the cycle of obsession.


The first step in seeking help for obsessive behavior is to find a therapist who specializes in cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) or dialectical behavior therapy (DBT). These therapies focus on identifying and changing negative patterns of thinking and behavior. In therapy, you will learn how to recognize and challenge distorted thoughts and beliefs, develop healthy coping strategies, and build resilience.


In some cases, medication may be prescribed to help manage obsessive thoughts and feelings. Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) and serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors (SNRIs) can be effective in reducing anxiety and obsessive-compulsive symptoms. However, medication should be used in conjunction with therapy and under the guidance of a medical professional.

Support Groups:

Joining a support group can also be helpful in overcoming obsessive behavior. Talking to others who have experienced similar struggles can provide a sense of community and understanding. Support groups can also be a valuable source of information, resources, and encouragement.

Remember, seeking professional help is a sign of strength, not weakness. It takes courage to acknowledge that you need help and to take steps to improve your mental health. With the right support and guidance, you can overcome obsessive behavior and move forward towards a healthier and happier life.

People Also Ask

How do I stop obsessing over someone who doesn’t like me back?

One effective way to stop obsessing over someone who doesn’t like you back is to focus on yourself. Spend more time with friends, family, and engage in your hobbies. This will help you to move on and focus on what makes you happy.

What are the signs of obsessive love?

Signs of obsessive love include constant checking of the person’s social media profiles, constantly wanting to be in their company, and feeling intense jealousy when they spend time with other people. Other signs include intense anxiety, panic, and severe mood swings.

Can love obsession be cured?

Love obsession can be cured with therapy, counseling or self-help. It is important to seek help if feelings of obsession are affecting your daily routine and relationships.

How long does it take to get over someone you’re obsessed with?

Getting over someone you’re obsessed with can take time. It varies from person to person but can range from a few weeks to months or even years. It’s important to practice self-care and seek help if needed.

Is it unhealthy to obsess over someone?

Yes, it is unhealthy to obsess over someone. Obsessive behavior can negatively impact your mental health and overall well-being. It can also have negative effects on relationships with others and can interfere with daily life.


Obessing over someone can be a difficult situation to deal with, but it’s important to remember that it can be resolved. Whether it’s seeking therapy, focusing on self-care, or finding someone to talk to, there are steps that can be taken to move forward. The key is to recognize the problem and getting the help that is needed to overcome it. So don’t hesitate to reach out for support and move towards a healthier, happier life.



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Hey there, I’m Bobby, but most folks around here know me as Dude. At, my mission is crystal clear: to untangle the knots of curiosity by bringing expert insights to life's most intriguing questions.
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